Paula Poundstone had the routine down. Every Thursday, she would hop on a plane, headline a theater, and return to a hotel room. Same for Friday and Saturday, typically returning to her 10 cats and two dogs in Santa Monica on Sunday.

Wash, rinse, repeat. For many years.

No more. Not with a pandemic. Shows cancelled, and career — at least the performing in front of real people part of it — exiled to COVID-19 purgatory.

Financially? Grim, to be sure. Emotionally? Let Poundstone explain.

“I saw the other day where Michelle Obama said she had low-grade depression and I was so jealous. I’d kill to have low-grade. I’m thinking, ‘How does she do it?’”

Yes, these are a troublin’ times for performers. Fortunately, Poundstone has several books out, a podcast where she can lean on celebrity pals as guests, and, hey, there’s so much more time spent walking the dogs and doing semi-workout videos under feline supervision.

“You have to be in good shape to do work-out videos,” Poundstone said, tickled she’s dodged the nasty virus.

“I’m very lucky. I’m very healthy,” she said by phone, granting a 45-minute interview to help promote the Aug. 22 live-stream comedy benefit for the Marin-based Wednesday’s Gift. While host Mike Pritchard and stand-up Michael Meehan take the stage in front of no audience at the Empress Theatre in Vallejo, the rest of the cast — Joe Klocek, Don Friesen, John Heffron and Poundstone — hope to conquer comedic timing via Zoom.

Entertaining? Hopefully, but with no in-person audience, “it’s not doing stand-up anymore,” believes Poundstone. “Stand-up comedy to me is a relationship with the audience in front of you. Not having an audience kind of cuts in on that.”

That’s not to say comedians should merely hibernate and wait for this pandemic to blow over.

“We’re doing what we can, definitely,” Poundstone said. “I think comedy has a role to play in our getting through all this and having some sort of connection and being able to laugh. I can’t say I’ve found the magic key to making a hilarious Zoom show. I haven’t. I keep working at it. I’ll figure it out. I do hate Zoom. It’s part of our punishment.”

Oddly, Poundstone was scheduled to perform at the Empress in August. Now it’s from her living room, helping the nonprofit cause of Wednesday’s Gift that assists people who fall through the cracks.

“We’ve wanted Paula for a long time,” said Sid Hartnett, Wednesday’s Gift board president. “It’s unfortunate it’s taken a pandemic to make her available. But we’re happy she can help.”

Right up there with the disappointment of leaving her bags packed at home is the inevitable cancellation of Poundstone’s annual invitational ping pong tournament at her home. And yes, she said, it’s definitely “ping pong” she’s playing — not “table tennis.”

“Ping pong, no question. I understand what the Olympians do is table tennis. It’s not what I do,” Poundstone said. “I do play a mean game of ping pong, but there’s nothing high fallutin’ about it. It’s pizza, soda and candy and a lot of trash talk.”

The next scheduled tournament is January … but who knows, Poundstone said.

“I don’t know if I’ll be living. This is the year of uncertainty and trying to handle it with grace,” she said. “I don’t know what will happen. I might have to move.”

Calling the impact of COVID-19 “a disaster … it really, really is a disaster,” Poundstone said she “is very lucky.”

“I have a roof over my head, I have dogs and cats, and a couple of podcasts. That’s something I’m able to still do and glad of it.”

Poundstone is active on Twitter, though she acknowledges her comments are far more serious than they were pre-COVID-19 and pre-social unrest.

“It’s weird,” she said. “Sometimes they’re funny and sometimes that’s not the goal.”

The spare time allowed Poundstone to drive from Southern California to Portland recently and participate in the social protests.

“A friend of mine told me there were no bathrooms because of the virus. I was like, ‘I’m going anyway.’ I felt I should be there to witness it,” Poundstone said. “If they were going to hit me with sticks, hit me. I just went up, protested, and drove back home.”

Granted, Poundstone admitted to hoping for fairy tale endings to all these contemporary problems. It’s from watching all those Brady Bunch episodes in the 1970s, she said.

“I expect family problems to be solved in 22 minutes,” Poundstone said. “What would (pops Brady) Mike have done?’ I have fallen for a certain amount of media influence.”

It was early afternoon and Poundstone talked around her demanding pets. Yes, she has 10 cats — with two dogs for variety.

“Cats are so demanding. They’re crying at me now. It’s 1:15 and I feed them at 3 o’clock. It’s a two-hour vigil of crying,” Poundstone said. “I’m home a lot and they still don’t get all the attention.”

And the dogs?

“One ate half a ball right in front of me so I could enjoy watching her throw up,” Poundstone said.

Humans can be just as irritating, the comic says. Well, humans in animal costumes. One time Poundstone visited Disneyland and her son, Thomas, sat on a chain that kept people in line.

“You’re not supposed to, of course,” Poundstone said. “So Eeyore (the gloomy character from Winnie the Pooh) came over and pushed him off. We were so blown away. I figured he just flipped out and decided he would quit. But before he’d quit, he’d assault a child. Nothing was reported.”

These days, besides the occasional drive to a protest, Poundstone gets to the grocery store every other week.

And that’s about it.

“I miss people,” she said. “I write letters and talk on the phone with bad connections. I miss casual smiles from strangers, which I got a lot of in my work.”

Yes, she misses those Thursdays through Saturdays headlining across the country and returning home, comparing it to “a cattle drive.”

It’s not like Poundstone leans on other comics for comfort.

“I don’t have a tremendous amount of close friends that are comics,” she said. “Some of those guys are in similar position and didn’t bother to save their money. I didn’t see this coming. Pandemic? I certainly hadn’t used the word ever in my life. I didn’t understand why such a thing can happen. Now I know.”

Still, out of habit or just plain hopeful, Poundstone has a carry-on bag packed.

“I keep vacuuming it,” she said, vowing a career performing in front of people “is comedy back, by God.”

Poundstone said she’ll wait it out, doing her podcasts and occasional Zoom and live-streamed shows like the one originating Aug. 22 out of the Empress Theatre. She’s definitely not moving — yet. And it definitely won’t be to Mexico.

“My Spanish is not that good,” she said. “I have an English/Spanish dictionary and the page with ‘si’ seems to be dog-eared. That’s an indication my Spanish isn’t that strong.”

The 8th Annual Evening of Comedy & Wellness for Wednesday’s Gift is virtual Saturday, Aug. 22, 6 p.m. For information, visit wednesdaysgift.org or empresstheatre.org.