CHICAGO—Following an 80-74 win over the Phoenix Mercury, the Chicago Sky erupted in celebration this week after clinching the franchise’s first-ever mention in a newspaper’s sports section. “They said it would never happen in Chicago, but here we are, right at the bottom of the page in the corner,” said star center Candace Parker, teary-eyed, hoisting a copy of the Chicago Tribune above her head as her teammates showered one another in champagne. “We made history here today, and the fact that it’s my hometown paper makes it so much sweeter. Ever since I was a little girl, I dreamed of bringing home a 2-by-2-inch picture of my face next to the Northwest Illinois regional high school lacrosse scores, and I can’t believe it happened in my first season. Of course, it was a team effort, and we couldn’t have gotten here without Coach Wade, who knows someone at the Trib and called in a favor. No one can take this win away from us—it’s in permanent ink.” At press time, it was revealed the team mention was part of a larger argument in favor of bulldozing the Wintrust Arena into a satellite parking lot for Soldier Field.